Time for change?

Today, I made a decision. Not a final one, maybe not even a long-term one — but a decision all the same. I've realised I need to reevaluate my career. I’ve spent so long doing a job I once loved, but now I find myself falling out of love with it. Not because of the students — they’re the reason I’ve kept going this long — but because of how some senior staff seem to think they can treat us. 

It’s the constant push to tick boxes, to log calls, to justify every second of my day. I didn’t sign up to be an admin machine. I signed up to support young people, to make a difference. Not to track every phone call and spend more time in front of spreadsheets than with students who actually need our time and energy. 

And today, something in me snapped. Or maybe clicked. Either way, I’ve finally made the decision to apply for my Primary Teaching qualification. 

It might seem sudden. I might even change my mind in a few days. But that’s okay. Because for once, I’m listening to myself and taking action rather than just complaining or feeling stuck. I’ve always said I’d regret not trying more than I’d regret failing — and honestly, what have I got to lose? 

One thing I do know is that I’m incredibly lucky to have a supportive partner — someone who seems to believe in me more than I believe in myself some days. That belief means more than he probably realise, especially right now when I’m still figuring things out.

Maybe this is the change I need. Or maybe it’s just the beginning of figuring out what’s next. Either way, it feels good to take back a bit of control.